The article talked about how he knew that he was going to heaven soon. How he knew that he was sick, and had been sick for a long time. He had heart trouble that was a result of a childhood fever. It left his joints to slowly degenerate and his heart to slowly weaken. It talked about how he knew what was coming and how he was ready. He said that he was proud of his wife. My grandmother stayed a solid example of real life loving for 58 years. She's the strong quiet translator. She explained and healed and was his partner in crime all that time. The article asked lended ear to his pride in his children and grandchildren. It explained that he was happy to have lived a full honest life.
I had the chance to stay with my grandparents during my first year of graduate school. They graciously allowed me to stay rent-free in their home during a time when money was tight and i did nothing but work, and work, and go to school and try to get good grades.
During that time I was able to listen and watch my grandma and grandpa. It wasnt at all like Keeping Up With the Kardashians. There werent long hair-spray induced arguments about Chanel hand bags or photo spreads in V magazine... No one complained about the fact that their trip to Tibet was re-scheduled because of a natural disaster. Grandpa re-built John Deere tractors. Grandma vacuumed up orange cat hair left all over the house by their gargantuan cat named Marmelade. Marmy was everything that an old persons cat should be.... and he remains petulant to this day.
My grandpa said alot less than he produced and every day impressed me with his work ethic. Whenever something dramatic happened in the family would happen... of a late he would beg a sense of grace and forgiveness from the combatants. He would call us all to lay down our bloody weapons and our razor tongues, and just for Christ's sake act like grown-ups for a dang second. I hope that his influence will last in that department... as the rest of my family is comprised of hot headed magma mouthed school girls who just MUST be right. Honestly. Its enough to turn Thanksgiving into an angry lynch mob.
Grandpa saw all this. He saw that eventually his kids were going to grow up and hammer out their own path through life. They were going to fall down, and get up.... and fall down and get up again. And he understood that this was the way of things. Its one of the things that i admired so very much about him. He would so much rather be ordering five or so gallons of a specialty green paint for his latest machine project than to be party to yet another family spat. Such insight he must have had. When he was born telephones were community things... the kinds of devices that five or six housewives could listen in on during an important call. He got to see airplanes. Television. Vaccines. War.
I miss him. I didnt realize at that time during school when i was just driving and working and falling asleep during class that i was also having the most amazing exposure to a fascinating and honorable man. I was given not just the gift of housing and plumbing and in-door heat... I got to see where I came from. Who i came from. Good people. A good man.
His name was Albert Urch. People dont name their kids things like Albert anymore. They name them Trent, or Lindsay, or Chase, or Apple. Pish. Silly names for silly directionless children who are doomed to say more than they ever work and do nothing but cause trouble for other people. What a true loss for the world.
I could go on 'Salt' readers. I only intended to say why I havent been saying much. I wish more people had gotten the chance to watch my grandpa live. For them to listen as he rattled of part numbers for ancient agricultural devices, and for them to offer polite laughter as he flipped through one of his awful jokes that he had told no less then 8 times annually. Because maybe they would have seen that life is actually not all about film stars and fast cars... Its not about making your family disgusted with you at every chance you get. Its about living with purpose. Its about loving like you mean it. Its about keeping wedding vows and ploughing vegetable gardens. Its about nurturing goodness in the people that you love and praying they make good decisions.
I miss him, not just because he was my grandpa.... but because for me he represented a sort of honest living that fades away in these times. He stood for things that had validity and wholesome clever charm. He made my grandmother happy for 58 years. He is survived by people that can only dare to live with such bravery and die with such dignity.
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